Missing you

I wish i was present,i wish i was there with you right now but i am not and even though distance might have us apart and even though i feel like i never say it often enough,i miss you and i adore u and that funny chin :). the more i get to know you, the more i wish this story never ends... i mean it,i really do. And at this moment your probably out taking a walk, i just want you to know i am with you because your with me every single day,in my heart and on my mind. And i probably should start saying this more often too,because i don't think i let you know quite often enough. i miss you,i wish i was there with you, taking care of you, but i am not. i can only be here and pray for you and hope you get soon.and yes i know i said it twice but i do,... i miss you and i hope this puts a smile on your face even if it's just for awhile.

I Promise

i am on my way home,far away from you,i kinda smell the way you do,i want to tell you but i don't,i have a feeling that you already feel the same way too,i miss you.i keep my lips shut and never say whats going through my mind most probably cause i like hearing your voice all the time...i do.but then again there so many things i want to say,hope we have as much time as my heart tells me we have,cause i don't wanna wakeup in the morning thinking damn,what did i do,what did i say,maybe if i made her smile more or did things more different then she wouldn't have walked away, i stare at you while you asleep and plant sweet kisses upon your face.left a couple of notes so you have little pieces of me since i have gone away, but i will be back... i promise

the best!

tomorrow,tomorrow,i miss you tomorrow your always a day awaaaaaaaay,for reason which will remain unexplained untill the return of christ,i have chosen to open todays blog topic in this particular manner,now,it's been awhile and to frankly be honest i am not sure if anyone is going to read this but i keep writting either way,it's almost a year passed and i am not sure how to explain what i feel or how i feel but i guess older would be the right word,sadly not wiser but i am working on to that boat or swimming towards it,whatever elaboration the reader might prefer.i don't miss anyone...nope..noone,which is rather odd because as i recall just a few months back i couldn't stop thinking about people i missed,but now everything has sort of gone blank.hmmm,..i do appreciate the people who supported me through a rather unexpected shady season,thank you eze and sani that one week surely did the trick and thank you for the hospitality,you guys are the best honestly,i say that again "the best".well so far nothing has changed...nothing is new..maybe the weather,let me get my legs moving towards setia jaya and see a man about a horse.i have started feeling helpless but atleast i am becoming more altruistic as the days go by and honest,yes honest,now let get a move on,catch you next time

Houstatlantavegas

Why can't we just have a moment where i get to make you feel special,make you smile,give you a compliment and make you feel confident,you know you didn't get all dressedup like that for nobody to notice.you know you didn't showup tonight so that we could fuss and fight and talk about all the times i wasn't there for you when you needed me the most and how i made you cry and how you thought about me alone at night(maybe we can talk about that),cause i am not ready to have this conversation,i feel like i won't like how this puzzle turnsout,so a little hint now and then wouldn't hurt or spoil a surprise,you say we argue and we fight but how would joy feel so good if it wasn't for pain,how do you want me to describe that your what perfect means to me and i can't describe the feeling that i get when you are next me,it's more than physical,did i mention i love that scar you have on your naval,i think it's sexy even though you don't really like it.Take my hand,close your eyes,listen to this words:A happy ending is not guarranteed,but i will be happy with nothing as long as there is you and me.hmmm....i think all this smoke is cloggingup my brain....lets be serious abit, i know your sick and tired of arguing but you cant keep things bottled in,jealousy has got to go,i know that the past hass been kinda hard on you but i see a world in you and i just want to nurture it,though this love may hurt abit,if theres is ever a wave we learn to surf or i am going to build a bridge over it :),follow your heart and mind,i always love to see you smile and when you feel opposite i will never get tired of letting you know your whole being is beautiful and the millions ways your perfect,to make this work i am going to do the best that i can do because i am the best when i am with you,you help me to discover me and i just need you to put your trust in me,i kinda laugh when you curse at me ,the aftermath is you touching me,it's destiny that we are connected neither time nor space can change the way that i feel and maybe......after reading this you will understand how i feel when i say your the only one i will ever......need.i say that again,"ever.....need" :).i recieved an email today and for no good reason it made me write all this,(i know someone is reading this going "@^%@$$") anyway it's thursday so the maids are checking in to my apartment to see if we have been descent,but they are in for a surprise LOL! :) ,Something about Houstatlantavegas....

some things are meant to be :)

okey,moment of clarity,somtimes somethings don't turnout exactly how you want them to be and maybe we have to let go of yesterday so that we can see tomorrow but what happens when your present is not what you envisioned, and when you miss home,your mum's voice is the only thing that keeps you from losing grip of reality,you want to open up to your friends but thats too much of a risk so everything is just a thought in your head and your dreams are the only things that keep you striving for more, but what happens when you get there.if you had to do it again,would you risk it all? would you kiss you mother goodbye and tell daddy you have to leave?because lose is pain and standing on the other side of that plane i understood that i might never see you again.but thats just how i felt and at that moment i understood how it felt to lose a friend to distance and i think i saw the pain my mum felt when she said goodbye to me and everytime i talk to her and she says everything is ok and i feel like saying,"mum,please don't lie to me" and maybe she is worried that she might never see me again.she was always used to having me around,i understand that she just wants to see me safe, but some journeys we must take alone and pray we make it home because when it's all over thats the only place we belong,as we hope to find someone to spend forever with,thats a search thats right beside our dreams,we never think about it because it doesn't feel important but as you get older your mind state changes and you think differently, maybe thats how some things are meant to be :)

Everybody say "Overpriced Education"

when you wakeup in the morning,you either want to go back to sleep,or start thinking about what you have to do then decide to go back to sleep or......get out of bed and do something,some people have more choices but i only have those three,it's the going to bed that get s me workedup,and i endup staying for awhile before i can drift off to slumbertown,counting sheep has never been effective and whenever i decide to do it,i endup thinking what colour are the sheep,are they male or female,are there sheep jumping a fence somewhere as i am thinking of this consistent repeat of sheep jumping a fence?,....maybe not,but who can prove me wrong.aaanyway apart from that,it's the in between that really gets me going,it's such a drag to get out of bed and stay awake,then go back into hibernation and do the same thing all over again tomorrow,seriously think about it.each person on earth is a soul and our occupation is to take care this machines we call our bodys,wash them feed them a.k.a fuel them,learn how to operate various parts,and maybe also teach them(our bodies) some new tricks.a friend of mine once said we are all angels without wings,i personally think that that is a beautiful statement but i can't really make any sense out of it,...okey maybe i can but i don't want to discuss that now,same way i don't want to discuss men wearing female underwear.but the otherday i was checkingout some university brochures and i bumped into tuition fees with the price tag 467,000USD.your face is probably as shocked as mine was,so before this moment passes by take a camera point it in your direction but don't say "cheese",Everybody say "overpriced education".

It's been a Pleasure

A toast to all my friends in Malaysia,the ones that i knew before i stepped out of that flying contraption called an airplane and the ones i got to know as the year 2009 marched towards omega.Cheers to my family and friends back home,words can't describe how i feel not spending Christmas and new year with you so i am just going to remain silent, but i know that in due time i will be back and we will we make better memories than the ones we have at present,Kudos to Topman for making possible the manufacture and sale of "awesome" underwear,Hoorah!! to the existance of 7elevens and mamak's,without you cheap food and canned food wouldnot be available in the middle of the night,Cheers to all my classmates for fillingup some of the extra seats in class and also for being cool.Okey now that we have that out the way WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!:D,2010 we made it!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!! YEAH!!!!:D!! okey,just had to let that out,better late than never,and even though i want it to,nothing lasts forever,Honestly everybody,i would just like to say It's been a pleasure.